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Why is it that all Aliens/Gods in Thor are white Caucasian hunks who speak English with American accents and always make their landings on earth somewhere in the US? Even if I understand these given that it is an American movie based on an American comic-strip, there’s something more profound that I failed to appreciate. Why is it that, despite being so advanced vis-à-vis the human race in terms of knowledge and ability, the Asgard-s still rely on horses for day-to-day conveyance, and haven’t managed to get monarchy and dictatorship abolished? To cut a long story short, I found the movie as brainless as the characters that populate it. Thor, an arrogant hammer-wielding alien/god, and heir to the Asgard throne, is abolished to the earth by his ageing father, where he befriends a pretty astrophysicist (who, as Rogert Ebert has pointed out, is more of a storm-chaser & UFO-hunter), while also fights his father’s enemy (why wasn’t I surprised that Thor’s younger brother turns out to be the villain?). The film is filled with clichéd dialogues, juvenile sense of humour, predictable plot, and utterly unimaginative action sequences that are not worth watching – leave alone in 3D. It was also really perplexing to see such accomplished actors like Anthony Hopkins, Natalie Portman and Stellan Skarsgard agreeing to play such wafer-thin, one-dimensional characters… perhaps the pay packets were really good.
Director: Kenneth Branagh
Genre: Action/Fantasy/Adventure
Language: English
Country: US
La Femme Nikita might be the movie Luc Besson is most widely remembered by, and also one of the key features of the Cinema du look movement, its in-your-face stylizations, bizarre plot developments and over the top action sequences made this glossy French flick a no-brainer for me. The movie is about Nikita, a gauche and violent junkie, who is transformed into a sexy, lethal assassin. The movie is pumped with a heavy dose of adrenaline with testosterone-fuelled scenes that were supposed to be visually exuberant, but turned out to be no more than cringe inducing. Had the director kept it simple, it might have been two hours of fun; unfortunately, he introduced a lot of psycho-babble and pseudo-character developments that weren't commensurate with the ludicrously hyper-violent tone of the movie. What Besson perhaps didn’t realize in the first place was that, given the kind of disgusting character he chalked out for Nikita in the first third of the movie, viewers would never view her pangs of conscience and complex moral dilemma in the remaining two-thirds with empathy or understanding. Perhaps the only saving grace of the movie, apart from its slick look, was Jean Reno’s memorable cameo as a laconic ‘cleaner’ – his mere presence added a layer of dark humour in this otherwise callous and inane post-noir.
Director: Luc Besson
Genre: Thriller/Action/Spy Movie
Language: French
Country: France
Away with Words has nearly everything that could be there in the cinematography section – from point-of-view shots to flashforwards, from subdued blue filters to bright natural lightings, from standstills to motion blurs; and they are all a treat to the eye. Of course, coming from world’s most famous DOP Christopher Doyle (of Chungking Express and Hero fame), this was expected – more so since he had complete carte blanche given that this is his directorial venture. And one cannot deny the fact that his exceptional usage of visual montages has created an intensely surreal feast for the viewers. However, it can’t also be denied that Doyle’s directorial debut is an exceedingly curious, psychedelic and experimental movie devoid of any narrative, despite the theme of loneliness and alienation trough the tale of its two protagonists – a Chinese guy with the ability to associate physical dimensions with abstract words, and a hard-drinking Australian (undoubtedly Doyle’s alter ego). Too many liberties were taken where more restraint was necessary principally because Doyle the cinematographer strongly overshadowed Doyle the filmmaker. Hence the end product is a visual delight for the eyes but a bizarre jumble of undecipherable sequences for the mind.
Director: Christopher Doyle
Genre: Psychological Drama/Ensemble Film/Experimental
Language: Chinese
Country: China (Hong Kong)
Kidnap – the tale of a mysterious young man kidnapping a wealthy guy’s daughter to exact a very personal revenge – has the kind of plot that had a dark, moody, psychologically stimulating thriller written all over it. Unfortunately director Sanjay Gadhvi messed up beyond salvage point; hence what we have is nothing more than a formulaic, song-and-dance, run-of-the-mill Bollywood thriller more intent on pleasing the audience than disturbing them. Sanjay Dutt, as a hulking but sensitive alpha-man, is good; Imran Khan as the brooding kidnapper is still not ready to play a role as challenging as this; Manisha Lamba as a silly, perpetually midriff exposing, fashion-obsessed nymphet cum hostage (whose mother looks same age as her with slightly lesser cleavage to offer), is truly terrible. And if, like me, you have watched Park Chan-Wook’s acclaimed Vengeance Trilogy, you’ll indeed do well to keep away from this one and save yourself the blushes.
Director: Sanjay Gadhvi
Genre: Thriller/Psychological Thriller/Revenge Movie
Language: Hindi
Country: India
If you have some time to kill and you’ve exhausted all viable options, you might as well watch Wanted; but if you are a regular at forums for art cinema, infested with literati and intellectuals, do yourself a favour by not revealing you actually watched this one. So this is probably the last time I’ll let the world know that I’ve watched this unintentionally funny and overtly fantastical yet another brought-to-screen-from-graphic-novel popcorn action thriller. The movie involves a cult group of assassins, revenge, a chase sequence reminiscent of Terminator II, action scenes heavily “influenced” from Matrix, son-getting-reacquainted-with-his long-lost-daddy stuff, to name a few – but lets not spoil the fun for would be viewers by revealing more. However I must warn all you lovers of kick-ass movies – the stunt scenes here are ludicrous at best and ridiculous at worst. The director even managed to make Anjelina Jolie look dumb. The only saving grace of the movie perhaps was that Jolie was kind enough to let us have an extended look at her exquisitely-shaped and utterly delicious uncovered posterior to help us recover a part of the money we paid for the proceeds. And yes, if you have a company to share the laughs like I did, you might actually have some no-brainer fun at the cost of the hapless actors and the over-ambitious director.
Director: Timur Bekhmambetov
Genre: Action/Thriller/Chase Movie/Action Comedy/Fantasy
Language: English
Country: US
